|Because I can haz cat.|
From the BBC: Body found in well is Polish man. Something about this self-reflexive headline disturbs the editor in me.
From the Fort Wayne News Sentinel: Officials say 3 tried to dig out of Indiana jail . Because you have to try.
From NBCNews.com: 'Mama Mia!': Mafia killer allegedly fed rival to starving pigs. Extremely unappetizing.
And in inter-species military action: Mariota, Ducks hold off Beavers in wild Civil War.